Sydney Lockdown 2.0
As I write this Sydney is in the middle of “Lockdown 2.0” or the Lockdown you have when you are not having a lockdown. While we are told to stay at home, shops are open, the sun’s shining and outdoor exercise is what we’re allowed to do, so do it we will! My personal view is that most people are trying to stick to the rules, those rules however do allow for quite a bit of activity.
I do still find it to be a bit of an emotional and mental battle - to have the hum of routine and activities that make up life taken away and a void created where they were. For the sake of my own and my housemate’s sanity I am now working in my room, which I deeply resent. I don’t like the intrusion into a space I’ve worked hard to make a sanctuary from the world outside. I like the separation of work and home life. In it all, I am more than aware that I am lucky, lucky to have a job, lucky to be able to do said job remotely, lucky to not be worried about money. It is however, a fundamental change. And remains a fundamental change to the life we knew for better or worse.
We have all felt the impacts of this pandemic differently. The underlying anxiety that has crept into our lives, I personally feel every single day. A personality that is wired to think the worst case scenario and work back from there, is not the easiest to live with in endless days of worst case scenarios being played out. What’s helped? Being aware of it was the first part for me, the second being that there are loads of things out of my control, so I just can’t worry about them. What I can focus on are the decisions I make day-to-day, hour-to-hour and sometimes minute-to-minute. Decisions to have the piece of fruit or the block of chocolate, the glass of wine or the cup of tea, the walk around the block or the next 20 minutes zombie-scrolling on my phone. We’re at about 50/50 on most of those things tbh.
I try to stay aware of the things that help and the things that don’t. A daily debrief on that helps me see that in it all there is a heck of a lot of good. A lot to be grateful for, to smile about, to laugh about. Yesterday I went for a swim at Bronte (it’s July - middle of winter) with a friend. It was cold in the water, but the blast of salt, being caught up in the foam of the surf, laughing at it all - playing in the ocean pool set me up to face the next week and I couldn’t have been happier walking away with salty hair and skin, rugged up again, heater in my car blasting.
It is this kind of thing we should push for (I realise swimming in the sea in the middle of winter is not for everyone, take the principle, something to get you out of the mundane, something that will make you laugh, something that is playful and crazy but simple all at the same time). It is this inspires me that this life and this future we have is not full of doom, but is hopeful because there is so much that remains to enjoy in this world!
I hope I remember this time, the lessons learnt, the principles to take away to help shape that future.
What have your lessons been? (In whatever language you use for them)